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Friday 29 January 2021

Trans-parents: Enbies, Theybies, 6 foot 2" 'Mama' Ladies


This is an important message from the Bullshit Broadcasting Corporation. Please, do not adjust your set. 

Trans women are women. Trans men are men. Non binary people are non binary and their identities are valid. Some people have the brain of one sex, in the body of another. There are more than two sexes

*Sex and gender will be used interchangeably until activation of the Gotcha Clause, where you will be put in your place with shrieking distain by a thoroughly dishonest fool, informing you that 'sex and gender are not the same. Ok, boomer?'

In the interests of building a progressive and inclusive society, we hope you join us as an ally. In the case you can not extend human dignity and show acceptance of trans people, we ask that you stay quiet. 

This is the time we must fight for our rights, and our lives. Tempers run high, change is desperately needed although frequently misunderstood by our cis counterparts. Therefore, if you can't support us, if you refuse education, do not speak about or for us. Even unwitting transphobia is lethal and any subsequent fallout is, unfortunately, on you. 

The cast-type of the transphobe is ready made. It comes in all sizes and can fit based on a single measurement. 

If you don't confirm that which we ask of you, you are an enemy, an anachronism, a bigot and unworthy of respect in polite society. You are heartless, illogical, backwards and, it has been shown, likely a fascist who delights at the suffering of other, innocent, people. 

When the Parent is Trans; Enbies, Theybies, 6'2" 'Mama' Ladies.


Ari Dennis is a mother of two, and says she is non binary.
Her Twitter handle is @Arinotsorry, and she reminds us she is not sorry everywhere


(UPDATE: 

93 posts
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Arlo Dennis
@ADBeyondBaggage
Consultant and educator on LGBTQ+ diversity and culture with a focus on queer and nonbinary identity
Ari is now Arlo Dennis)


Ari is from Florida, and made the news in the UK when she went full on publicist, introducing her baby (clearly a boy) to the the word as not a girl of a boy, or even a baby, but a 'theyby'. 

Their sex is secret, no one, not even grandparents, know - even though Ari's mother lived with the family for three months after the birth. Even the birth certificate says 'unknown'. Ari strongly supports this;


That's right - 'sex designations offer no clinical utility'. I don't know where birth certificates are relevant in clinical circumstances, but it sounds kinda authoritative, doesn't it? I think biological sex has multiple, acute indications in clinical settings, however. Still, she's even remembered to throw 'intersex' people under the bus so we mustn't doubt her credentials.

So, what's the point of this? Something to do with not assigning gendered expectations on this tiny child. Next time you're accused of conflating sex and gender, remember this.

Ari has a ten year old daughter who is also, she says, non binary. Now this baby is being upheld as a sex-and-gender mystery, a cocooned and expectation-free, unlimited-potential human. 


Ari's elder child burst free of all these harmful and irrelevant gender expectations at four years old. Which I'm sure was a spontaneous and organic decision. 

This is what motivates Ari to place her second child in a media-frenzied spotlight. 

This is positive, apparently. Maybe she's haunted by the four years her elder child spent 'living in the wrong body' / pronouns. My question; why make a spectacle of your child and their development? 

How is not only withholding gender (supposedly - pity Ari worships it so religiously) but the biological sex, the stone cold reality being there are two sexes, and every person on the planet is one or the other, a helpful tactic? And why invite the World and its whippet to watch?

Seems like you're grooming a child to be hyper-conscious of gender, to me, Ari. Seems like you are exploiting their development, their sense of themselves as a human, as if they were an art installation, a little social experiment of entirely your own making. 

Giving them a forced 'opportunity' to wonder what they might be, rather than un-self-consciously explore the world. Inviting the public to withhold their perception by way of extending a manufactured suspense as long as is possible, or as long as it takes to get the answer she wants.

Leaving your child to continually focus on this ridiculous, metaphysical / pseudo religious concept made not in reality but in stereotypical tropes and in the minds of Queer Theorists. They can score their enjoyment of certain clothes, certain books, media, fashion, and this, believes Ari, will help them discover their innate identity. 

But on what basis do they assess the masculine or feminine rating of these things? Ari says 'particular clothing or colours or toys or activities or genitals don't denote sex more than gender does'. So they have literally no grounding in biological truth, no framework to build on. 

They are suspended in time as a mystery to all, with apparently no definitions and no locus. All the while living against a backdrop of, well... in a household with a non binary mother who answers to 'Papa' and her polygamous partners, both appearing as trans women, Gwendolyn answers to 'Mama' and Bryniffer (nah, me neither) to 'Maddie'.

 

'Phwoar - look at the head tilt on that' said a friend. Another, especially cruel friend said 'say what you want about Brynnifer - which is not a real name - but he can take it on the chin'
'that's what Ari said, phnar phnar' 
We all laughed

One she is married to (probably Brynnifer, above) and she is in a relationship with the other. Every person in the home is trans, the adults have decided. More interesting still is, in Ari's interview with (an engorged-with-fury) Piers Morgan, Ari mentions Brynnifer and Luna as her co-parents. Not sure of the chronology here, and I failed to summon the fucks to look but either way within a short space of time, between baby Sparrow being 11 months and now three, one co-parent has been replaced with another. Ari also says Luna has nothing at all to do with the children now. Brilliant. 

And if these kids aren't isolated from their peers enough, using an alien vocabulary to the rest of the world and presumably being very well noticed in the community - they're home schooled. 

Asked how long each day her eldest studies, Ari says no more than one or two hours a day, the rest is 'child led'. Let's think of the queer theory shite Ari sees as central to everything, and then imagine her idea of education. She is, after all, a 'gender open' childcare educator. How is this not reminiscent of anti-science religious orders or cults? 


Have a gander at this advice to parents Ari shares on her page, from a page called 'Queer Little Family';

"Non-binary to kids? Easy-peasy lemon crocodile. Kids are accepting. Kids take everything in like a sponge. Now is the time to be teaching them... They take it all in, accept it and grow up with it "

So, that's great and not even slightly concerning...

"...[during a conversation with their four year old, 'Snappy'] - 

Me: "You know I'm not a girl or a boy don't you?" 

Snappy: "I know, you're both, mum told me." 

Me: "Exactly, and some people are neither and some people change."

Snappy: "I think I'm both." 

And then as I was saying good night: "You can be anything you want." 

"I want to be a girl and boy and a girl and a boy. I said that two times".... Gotta love the ego of a four year old. Must be doing something right... It's really not that hard. 

Don't be afraid to have these conversations. The sooner the better. They can handle it. Trust me. *Countless hashtags follow*

Why would a parent deliberately foster a potential clash of psychological and physical congruity in their child? What is it with these wannabe-celeb trans influencers and their total disregard for the privacy and dignity of their children? 

From Mimi Lemay writing 'A letter to my 5 year old son' as an article in the Boston Times, to the heartbreaking portrayals in Transhood, the constant stream of exclusives on Jazz Jennings to Charlize Theron unveiling her adopted seven year old as trans, there's a theme here and it's disturbing. 

For the life of me, I cannot imagine soliciting so much attention on any child, much less one struggling with identity. It also completely scuppers the common claim that it's a potentially lethal act to 'out' previously closeted people.

These kids will never be able to escape it and are far too young to consent. But it's ok, it's about making the world a better place and Ari reads her kids carefully;


Ari's theory is that as her children grow, trying on different clothes and being treated as a girl and then a boy and then as someone who isn't easily unidentifiable, they will learn about their 'options'. So build your identity, your ego, your sense of self on what's most expedient, on how you are perceived through what you assume to be the eyes of others.

What a fragile existence. And let's not forget this androgynous quality will vanish, dramatically, by puberty. That is when the shit truly hits the fan and biological truth is inescapable. No doubt 'options' like puberty blockers are likely to be enthusiastically taken up and probably long ago raised as a possibility for her eldest child. 

The idea a four year old autonomously came up with the idea she is non binary, in this family, is laughable. It's a hideous, enraging, tragic shit show.

And, isn't being trans hard? What about the frequently cited suicidality in trans people? The oppressive and ever-present transphobia, the struggles and high rates of abuse we hear of all the time? Why, why on earth, would you be encouraging this? Why not be open about the child's sex and you, as the parent, do the hard work of protecting them from constraints built on discriminatory generalisation, sexism and homophobia? 

Repeatedly Ari mentions that the child has 'certain anatomy', she mentions genitals a lot. Even fake ones. Here's her idea of age appropriate sex education;

"Yes honey - I am a person with a 'front hole' so when I want to access mama's prostate I use this - but obviously it gets dirty!"

Presumably, Ari sees this as healthy, open and child led. 














I think it's a sea of red flags. 

Apparently genitals don't indicate the sex of a person. And we should all know exactly what she's telling her little girl about. But it's obviously had some great consequences, and these kids can be whatever they like - such japes!



No one wants to be seen as they really are in this family. Mum is Papa and the embarrassingly be-frocked Dad is Mama, another man is present as a woman and referred to as a co-parent, and is clearly replaced swiftly if he leaves. 

'We are doing this to enhance kids potential' says Ari: 'This can't go wrong' - she says that if gender is within us, it will out. How the fuck it is our side of the divide are accused of confusing sex with gender? Hey Ari, Brynnifer and Gwendolyn (interesting fact - the 'ladies' in this house appear too bear zero responsibility in the child raising) here's a pro tip:







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