A letter to my daughters, now you are fodder for the wolves

So, I've been trying to work out when exactly did we begin to celebrate throwing you, dear daughters to the wolves?

It can't have been so long ago, as women have for many years been gaining ground. Our legal rights have been up until recently consistently strengthening; our representation has improved; we have faster, louder, harsher backlash to overt misogyny.

Sometimes.

While I imagine today countdowns in tabloids whereby a girl about to turn 16 is slowly exposed, an item of clothing a day, til she can legally occupy page 3 with her tits out would provoke fury, and rape within marriage wasn't even a crime until 1992, I'm not convinced a popular 'civil rights' movement would get away with sexual degradation to a wall of silence as they do now, with every critic decried as a TERF.

When JK Rowling is subject to an unhinged and gleefully repulsive, misogynistic backlash for month upon month for critiquing the current doctrine and the erasure of women, you know which side you're demanded to stand with. When women wishing to discuss proposed changes to the law which will directly impact them and their rights are both libelled and harassed without anyone giving an example of their supposed hate, every other woman is made aware that self-defence is indefensible. Everyone knows to be TERF or a SWERF is the worst thing that you can be. But it's definitely not a slur.

So, what makes a TERF? 

Lots of things! Being traumatised by rape and / or child sexual abuse and, as a consequence of that, not liking penises. Not having sex with those penis-persons because you are a lesbian. You think everyone has a right to full sexual autonomy and that this necessarily includes discrimination, in the purest sense of the word? Genital preferences and penis aversion are TERF dog whistles. They are exclusionary, colonial constructs. Penises can be female; it's all about the mouth-feel. 

Jana Cornell is one of the bravest women on earth. See here for a catalogue of some of the abuse she has suffered from trans rights activists 

Maybe it's doubting that crushing the ingrained response to males in sensitive female only spaces is an acceptable thing and not wildly dangerous. Or not believing you can actually change sex; caring for women in prison and their rights to safety, privacy and dignity 

Not pretending that FGM is based on gender, rather than sex could do it, too. Let's keep it intersectional and relevant - in the first world, thanks. Maybe you dared show knowledge of the crime patterns that distinguishes males and females, although that won't be a problem for long, not with modern crime recording.

Believing a male MMA fighter who, age 31, transitions to 'female' probably shouldn't be fighting actual females makes you a violent TERF. Calling a sex offender out for using trans rights definitely does, too.

TERF vacancies are also available for belief in biology, 'misgendering'. An absence of praise and hyperbole when confronted with a balding male asserting his womanhood. General wrongthink. The symptoms might be varied, subjective even - but the prognosis is always the same - unworthy of representation; fascist; scum; filth; beneath contempt and certainly undeserving of human rights.

And a SWERF?

Not believing that prostitution is just normal work like any other. Or, maybe you think lap dancing clubs are damaging to women, or the degrading and gross-out acts  which dominate the porn industry are often harmful to the actors, viewers, and society. Congratulations, you are now scum.

If I wasn't so afraid of assuming gender, I'd say this is a man's chest in this teeshirt. How nice of him to 'support' those oppressed workers, eh?

We used to have fiery, outspoken women in feminist media that, although niche, took no shit. They didn't pander to men or to gender stereotypes, and sometimes they were so fucking wild they didn't even remove body hair!

Despite multiple attempts, this rag refuses to allow women to comment. Brave and stunning

Feminism is now mainstream, but with an important caveat - it is not about women, but for everyone! Today university magazine feminism which should be brave, enlightening, empowering and at least not outright patriarchy-wanking instruction comes out with preposterous bullshit like "SWERFs engender hatred, fear, and oppression of individuals in the sex work industry...(their)...SWERF ideology is not, in fact, focused on ending violence against sex workers, but rather on policing women’s bodies and sexuality." "SWERFs also make sex workers the target of bullying and abuse through doxxing .... protesting and picketing against safe sex work"

What the fuck has happened? How dare they publish such massive fucking lies and general old-bitch-shaming cautionary tales? We should be angry that you, our daughters, are being groomed by an edifice of smug, highly styled conspiritors with booming voices mansplaining women's experiences, orchestrating chants of 'burn the witch' and spinning entitled, male demands as essential civil rights.

It has infected our schools, universities and workplaces, our charities and popular culture, creating a surround sound of instruction that must be adhered to and while you are free to go about your life as long as you're not harming others, your every comment, like, connection and associate will be assessed and may be used against you in the court of public opinion.
Some things will be kept for prosperity, to be reeled off without context. Most things will be delivered immediately to the memory hole.
Be nice, they tell you. Be kind, repeat by rote these mantras and lies, deny your own most primal senses, your eyes and ears . You do not know male from female, you do not count for anything unless you centre the identity of males. 

Once at uni, any remnants of basic self protection learnt in childhood must be obliterated. Ladies, do not trust your gut instinct. Protect males in women's toilets.

Getting back to that article, where are the texts of these 'SWERFS'? What is the praxis? Where has a radical feminist doxxed a sex worker? What is 'safe' sex work? Why are they pushing abject bullshit with a tone designed for a primary school age group? Well, I wouldn't suggest asking this in real life. Think bible class under a theocracy and shut your fucking mouth.

breathe in love, radiate hatred

Intersectionality was a system by which black women could examine their own oppression. It was never for centreing males in feminism and giving them endless back up with analogies of segregation and the civil rights movement. It's the greatest imaginable gift to white, middle class males. Black women are paraded as props to compare with men, black men mean nothing unless 'queer' or killed by cop. But still, it's kindly gifted to them by a weary, porn-drenched generation who think that calling for their female sex class to have the legal protections other generations spilled blood over is akin to English nationalism or a Trump rally in MAGA hats.

As long as you forgo your intellectual honesty, privacy and dignity these you can continue in ditching your more vulnerable sisters and live in peace. You have to, because your whole media is colluding in this grand trick. To be female is nothing without being worthy, compassionate and self-sacrificing. You must know which fights to pick (when there are 'allies' and an audience) and which to sneer at. Sneer well, with good teeth and lipstick and you too can be the pseudo-punk caricature that men claim to be just a little bit scared of while slapping one out to your image.

The abject betrayal of this generation of women is hard to quantify. Where do you have to turn? Being in any way gender critical is social suicide, and any evidence at all of 'hostility' 'erasing the identity' 'denying the existence' of trans people (i.e. not joyfully reciting the slogans, admitting to a concern for same sex spaces, misgendering a penis etc) could easily result in social justice champions smirking heroically as they email your employers to demand your dismissal, lest they desire a hashtag campaign and gender defenders camping outside like very angry happy-clappy twats. If you're a lesbian, you have a rough time ahead. Apart from a couple of highly contentious lesbian magazines that would require some sort of justification if found, every one has come out as 'trans inclusive'. There's Autostraddle - How to have lesbian sex with a trans woman, along with DIVA magazine, Lez Spread the Word, Curve, LOTL and more who graciously include male-bodied 'lesbians' in their editorials, campaigns and readerships. If you read LGBTQ Nation, GayStar News, PinkNews etc etc you are constantly reminded to toe the line or be excommunicated as a bigot, bitch, cunt. A TERF.

Charlotte Clymer, the ex armed forces hunchback of not-sir-but-ma'am berates 'TERFs' from an ivory tower before slinging on heels to blush at compelled compliments. Clymer, we are told, is a feminist. And the cheat goes on, with Teen Vogue telling girls how to enjoy anal and dissociate themselves further from their manifest selves, while vice tells lesbians how to 'eat out' a woman with a cock and balls and the dreary, shallow lib fem magazines drone on "The argument behind SWERF ideology tends to be that sex workers, particularly those in the prostitution and pornography industries, become the victims of regular sexual objectification, exploitation, and violence" - well no shit. How delusional are these frigid bitches, huh? Continually banging on about how 'so many women happily choose sex work' is really going to free those trafficked into it, those groomed and coerced into it, those left with no other means to survive than by it, hey? How about the fact that in areas where prostitution is legalised there is a subsequent increase in illegal trafficking? And when the JobCentre orders you to down to that 'gentleman's club' and suck it or your benefits will be stopped? Does that honestly never occur to them, such is their insulation from relative poverty? Those who like to mention, but never critique, late stage capitalism have a problem. They can't see the problem.

ahh, of course - short-haired older women are the fly in the ointment, condemning these two young, attractive people for using their bodies! Intersectional feminism; centreing the image of smiley, white, photogenic  prostitutes from ad campaigns 

For those of us who do give a flying fuck about the people in sex work, apparently we argue that by "participating in this kind of industry, sex workers become co-perpetrators of these crimes...SWERFs take it upon themselves to tell other people what to do and what not to do with their bodies." Yeah, for fucks sake mum! It's, like, my body you know? Who are you to say that woman who desperately needs to fund her habit isn't really a nymphomaniac who finds me very attractive? It's supply and demand, no ethical choicrs in end stage capitalism, bitches.

Most 'SWERFs' have had some dealing with the reality of prostitution, and the problem here is really that men legitimise fucking someone who actually doesn't want to fuck them. It's a peculiarly male thing, an ambivalence to turn-on to sadistic kick, and I would argue the sexual conqueror attitudes among some men has a lot to do with their vast over-representation (97%) among sex offenders. And what is 'SWERF ideology'? You'll occasionally find women refer to themselves with heavy irony as TERFs, but never have I seen SWERF used as an auto-descriptor. Women who have concerns about the sex industries are very often victims of it. The idea male sexuality is such an ungovernable force that we would have a tide of rape in the event prostitutes were not up for business is the most insidious patriarchal lie I can think of.

So it goes that males need the outlet - everyone watches porn (which is increasingly engaged in violent, degrading and painful acts) and many women are empowered by it, we are told. The highly atypical woman with every benefit of capitalism is our muse here. Lets not think about the abused and broken, drug addicted and desperate, the trafficked, raped multiple times a day.

No glamorisation or romanticism here! This is 'shit in the way work is shit' non-judgemental realism! Look at her with her twirling feet, held up leisurely, flirtatiously as she poses like a teen girl in an American rom-com while negotiating her price

Victims are irrelevant, apparently. What is essential is to create a self fulfilling prophesy of empowerment, that's how it works. And it's okay - we'll deal with all the racial inequality issues with some hashtags and BLM logos. 

Sophie Wilson, a 23 year old, fully-comprehensive package deal ideologue and Labour councillor for Rotherham in Yorkshire, joined protesters campaigning against the council's decision to close Spearmint Rhino, a lap dance club which had over 200 breaches for code of conduct regulations, mostly relating to sexual touching. Of Wilson's critics was Sammy Woodhouse, a victim of Rotherham grooming gangs. While Wilson was planning her homework timetable and school trips, Woodhouse was being systematically raped by a never-ending series of men. She went on to fall pregnant by one of her pimps, but at some point she actually worked at the club. Rather than checking her privilege, listening to the oppressed, so she could gain insight, or at least balance, Wilson reached for labels. Slurs, used against women, that seek to delegitimise and shame the target. To Wilson, objection to Spearmint Rhino made these women 'Trashy SWERFs' with 'twisted morality' and an 'arrogance of old age'. In a move I'm sure Tommy Robinson embraced, she also accused MP Sarah Champion of using 'dog whistle racism' when she took up the issue of grooming gangs which had trafficked thousands of girls in the town over a couple of decades. So there we are - a role model for today's class warfare. Well, class war's top brass. A middle class, English Literature graduate who gives not a fuck about upsetting and publicly dismissing a well known constituent who was raped and controlled by a series of men from her early teens, because somehow it feels too close to punching down. Debate, notes this bright young thing, should be conducted in a 'comradely and respectful manner'. Which is just great, isn't it?

Katelyn Burns, a journalist and transwoman who claims to understand feminism, wrote for Vox "They (TERFs) now prefer to call themselves “gender critical,” a euphemism akin to white supremacists calling themselves “race realists.” 

Canadian politician Morgane Oger, who successfully defunded a rape crisis centre for their 'fascist' exclusion of penis-persons 

Yes, I suppose that's the feminazi bit explained. Perhaps all the Murdoch empire publications were correct all along. Acknowledging a manifest difference between male and female is Klu Klux Klan-adjacent. It's of course the best way to frame feminism - as a female supremacy. 

Burns goes on "In the early ’70s, groups of what would now be called “gender critical” feminists threatened violence against many trans women who dared exist in women’s and lesbian spaces" Burns' examples for this? "Beth Elliott, who was at the 1973 West Coast Lesbian Feminist Conference to perform with her lesbian band, was ridiculed onstage and had her existence protested"

How does one have their existence protested? Is ridicule violence? Burns then goes on to give a highly edited account of Mitchfest, a female only event, and how "pro-trans festival attendees organized “Camp Trans,” a space specifically welcoming to trans women who were otherwise banned from attending the event. The two groups clashed for a number of years, until more artists and organizations boycotted MichFest and organizers chose to end the event in 2015"
What Burns fails to mention is the organiser of camp trans, well known trans activist David Warfield / Dana Rivers had been driven to such fury over their woman-only policy, he went on to beat, stab, shoot and murder two attendees and their child.      Lesbian couple Patricia Wright and Charlotte Reed, and their adopted son, Benny were found dead and dying while Dana Rivers tried to set their home alight. This unspeakable level of hatred (in only 2016 - possibly why 2015 was the final event, eh, Katelyn?) clearly has some way to go for Burns before eclipsing the horror of a transwoman being sniggered at on stage nearly half a century ago.

Your only options are to laugh or ignore. Women - know your place 

But it's important not to get caught up in this. Consistency is the enemy. Men's sexual urges may be untameable and only managed by the subjugation of women who aren't you or your loved ones, but they're absolutely fine in women's same sex spaces. I mean, just look where exclusion can lead you! Trust them; they know better than you.

"TERFs, (who) promote(s) mistreatment and oppression of trans women and transgender people" continues the uni rag dressed up as a feminist publication. How so, we are not told. Just believe it, repeat ad nauseam, dear. "Both SWERF and TERF constitute anti-feminist hate groups." I really would like to evidence of this, over a refusal to refer to cocks and balls as she/her/hers.

Social media is awash with TERF and SWERF-damning. The gift that keeps on giving is the linguistic proximity to surf and turf, thereby allowing a slew of tags and groups and pages referencing 'excuse me, waiter, I didn't order the SWERF and TERF' imbuing the user of said phrase as the adult professional calmly correcting a mistaken table service, and definitely not the child of some hated, useless mother, rejecting her food and opinions with a smug pretence of sophistication.

Emilia Decaudin is a member of New York  State Democratic Committee. Decaudin's bio states "In October of 2019, she spearheaded a successful effort to amend the rules of the committee to remove unnecessary references to the gender binary and to accommodate the election of gender non-binary members". In wrongspeak, this means the rule 'one woman for one man' first introduced by suffragettes to ensure fair representation was gleefully destroyed, in the name of progress. Here's Emilia.

Doesn't this cheer your stony old heart? We have everything here - shaved side, kinky choker, dorky glasses, feminism, a tiny cock and all that rebellion! You could almost forget this is an average but sub-par white male. Until that is, those old of us to recognise base misogyny see this.

The audacity required to stand there, micro-penis slightly cresting the expance of a dour, shrunken dress, sparrow-legs in 10 denier, and claim to be a woman is astonishing to me. To then offer up his pitiful cornichon as a weapon of defiance is the most pathetically offensive act I can think of. The entitlement and delusions of adequacy are staggering 

How in fuck this is not a parody I cannot understand. Some budgy-smuggling, bandy-legged cretin in undersized clothes, a worthy expression almost concealing his smirking face, is on a stage, desperately fighting for any additional privilege he can wangle with a self entitlement rarely seen outside of the male sex of the ruling class. He demands his self-claimed identity makes him a literal women, and his prerogative to take their opportunities and spaces, too. Suffragettes, woman-centred campaigning is an anachronism, and this young white male represents one of our most marginalised minorities.

Then he tweets classic male sexual aggression as an attempt to to assert himself, unaware what it actually does is portray the pathetic incel he secretly so admires. And you better accept it, ladies.

What can you do? You have no right to examine nuance here, the only option for the modern, populist left-wing woman that leaves you socially intact is to denounce the canaries in the mine, kick sand in the faces of the real feminists, excommunicate heretics, scour your historic social media for anything dodgy and get ready to 'apologise unreservedly' for the hurt feelings of vainglorious cry-bullies. 

If you're fast enough off the blocks you don't need to incite violence. Tell the heretic in your mentions they are worthless, call them a TERF, post a snappy meme, deluge them in laughing emojis. Block them. Once this has been screen shot and immortalised, to be shown like certificate of vaccination, you are free to go for a while longer.  Or, you can refuse to play. You can avoid immersing yourself in, declaring allegiance to a 'left' that doesn't give a flying fuck about any rapes you suffer if it requires them to examine their politics. A 'left' that is not left, but poses as.

As a teenager, I was once queuing for the toilet in a very rowdy bar. There were, contrary to outrageous and fallacious reports, trans women who I and others knew and socialised with, shared the toilets with, and it was no bother. On this particular evening a very creepy transvestite I had met several times was there, and he was chatting to a girl older than me (but still underage). He tried to follow the girl into the toilet, and this was spotted by others including some older punk women. They shouted, stormed through the bar with authority and threw him out. Then they smoked his dropped cigarettes.

It turned out they didn't know him but had clocked him on arrival. The times I'd met him he'd approached me when I was walking home in the dark, and he would have fetish gear on under his coat. Each time I saw him he would ask did I know of a gay bar, where he would be safe to have a drink and maybe make friends. I was 15, 16, I was an unconventional, angry kid and I wanted to be kind, accepting, cool. I hushed by senses, I deliberately pivoted to being unshockable and cool, to view him as this poor oppressed guy, struggling with his identity. Walking round residential streets after dark, talking to teen girls about how he enjoyed rubber, and spanking, and water sports. I wasn't really aware of how much of a kick he got from telling me.

I look back to my teen self, feeling grown up and strong, having one night stands with men and women, getting drunk, taking drugs, being rebellious and rejected by family, wanting to escape the sexual prudishness of my childhood which, to my great confusion, accompanied sexual abuse. Wanting to be strong, free of bullshit judgements, thinking I was carrying it off.... And still not spotting a clearly predatory, straight man. Fighting my better instincts. That I was somehow surprised he never remembered that I had already told him where the gay bar was - as if I had given him what he was really looking for and he hadn't noticed - almost makes me weep for my brutalised, gullible, good hearted and stupid teenage self.

I thought the punk girls had overstepped the mark that night. It induced real cognitive dissonance as I struggled with the obvious cool and decisive justice of women taking no shit, and I felt an intense solidarity with and awe of them. But, I also thought they picked on the wrong guy, he'd been wrongly profiled and misunderstood. Obviously, now I see they were one of the few decent adults around and saved that girl. Being punk, iconoclastic, brave, fierce - it is being protective and defensive and strong and spitting in the face of the men who will do us harm. It is NOT this insipid value of respect and deny your eyes.

Fuck. This. Neoliberal. Postmodernist. Shit.

Fuck that. Kick their dicks off, spit in their faces, and if you must smile, do so as you run. They are lying to you, by brilliant, sweet, brave daughters. Question things, embrace non conformity, care about others. But always listen to your gut. It's a well honed and sophisticated self defence system built upon millennia of women's experiences and stories and comprised of a thousand silent, secret lie detectors that are constantly ticking by, reading micro-expressions, assessing changes in body language, voice pitch, volume, intensity. It tells you when something is wrong and while it's not infallible, it's your most reliable friend. Don't let other's tell you it is wrong - take that as a warning they might be very dangerous to you.

And don't take orders from strangers, posters or anyone you are not sure about. If you are an adult now, be an adult. Read the things you are forbidden to. Look for evidence over appeals to emotion. Don't be played.

You are up against a lot more than you know, and being nice won't save you. Tell these pricks to fuck off, and be a feminist.