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Saturday, 31 October 2020

Sex, Lies, and an Invidious Landscape

Why is it that trans organisations, charities, activists and the media want to present trans people as frail, weak, eternal victims?
 
It's an integral counterweight that allows for the excesses of trans activism, that's why. How, for example, can we be so fixated on Karen White's crimes and wary about what could happen when trans people face such terrible discrimination and violence? How dare you get so caught up in outrage over Vancouver rape relief centre being terrorised, or the shrill, authoritarian Labour Campaign for Trans Rights demanding A Woman's Place and LGB Alliance members be expelled from the party? 

'Don't you know what trans folx are going through right now?'

In September, The Canary stated - 'We stand in solidarity with the trans community against the physical, emotional, and cultural violence being perpetrated against them. Paris Lees explains what's really happening.'  

In her thread, Paris claims lots of things I would argue with, but I'll stick to her claim;

'THE AVERAGE LIFE EXPECTANCY OF A TRANS WOMAN OF COLOUR IN THE U.S. IS JUST 35'




It's commonly cited, Patricia Arquette has also said it, as has Indya Moore, although they claim it is for all trans women. But it isn't true.

While trans women of colour are certainly among the more vulnerable of those under the trans umbrella, by far those most at risk of murder are trans sex workers in Latin America, and that's where most of the data comes from. In addition, their average life expectancy was not 35 either. The average age of those who were murdered was 35 or younger. Which is not a surprise, as murder tends to happen to young people.
As well as this, a high number of these victims were sex workers, a notoriously dangerous life. 
And, how many women are murdered in the same conditions? I'll leave this (before I'm derailed) with a suggestion you try putting 'femicide + Latin America' into a search engine. These countries are obscenely dangerous, and it's a tragedy that hits in every angle.

(I could go on and on here and still not cover it as well as Katie Herzog at The Stranger;  - I definitely suggest taking your traffic this-a-way and rewarding such good, thorough and brave journalism).

TRANS PEOPLE FACE A GROWING EPIDEMIC OF MURDER!



Well, again - no. To work this out, we do get somewhat stumped by irregular or bad recording; this is becoming more and more of a problem. Legal fictions that erase the 'trans' could leave those with doctored birth certificate being wrongly overlooked as that adopted sex, according to some activists (this is one of those times when the 'trans' prefix is readily embraced), or maybe they are just closeted. Which is valid too!
Luckily, the press, an unending mob of LGBTQIA2S+ organisations and HRC never stop looking for the transphobia angle so while this argument pops up everywhere, I wonder if there's actually anything of substance they do have?
So bear that in mind, look at TDoR's spurious attempts to pass random gunpoint robbery as targeted anti trans hate and remember the definition is so broad that Dennis Rodman would be considered a woman.

These LGBTQIAA2S+ organisations have thousands of eyes watching out for anyone who might fall through the net.
Last year's Trans Day of Remembrance, 331 trans murders were recorded. I often see this attributed to just America, but no - 331 murders of trans people on planet earth. 
Around half occur in Latin America, so I won't repeat myself there.  
In America in 2017, professor Wilfred Riley at Kentucky state university studied the murder rate of trans people using data from the HRC (human rights council - an extremely pro-trans activism organisation) and FBI. He found that out of 100,000 trans people, 1.48 were murdered every year. This is significantly lower than the general population, at around 5 out of 100,000. For men generally it is 6.68, and for black men it is a staggering 18.8.

Average rate of murder per 100,000

Black Men = 18.8
Men = 6.68
General Population = 5
Trans People = 1.48


If, after all this, we factor in how many were killed by partners during domestic violence (like many, many women), how many were killed during robberies, hit and runs or other non-transphobia-motivated crimes I think we would have a very different picture again.
Verilybitchie does a great bit of unpacking here and here, for Queer Majority.

The UK murder rate of trans people in the UK according to Channel 4 fact here there were nine murders between 2007-2018. In addition I've looked at the records of Stonewall and Trans Day of Remembrance to come up to today.
The Channel 4 article was pretty good considering just how explosive this conversation is, but it gets some things wrong and avoids others totally.
Of the 9 deaths (found on TDoR records), one is Vikki Thompson. Thompson was found to have accidentally killed herself.  She was covered very sympathetically in the press - its a very sad story of a really damaged, vulnerable person - but she wasn't in a women's prison because she never applied for a transfer, and had been jailed for robbing a young girl and mother. 
Jacqueline Cowdry's death was initially reported as a murder but then found at inquest to be not suspicious.

So, thats 7 murders. One of these was Sonia Burgess, who was killed by another trans women, Nina Kinagassingham. Since Naomi Hersi in 2018, I haven't been able to find another murder of a trans person in the uk, which is surely a good thing?

Also between 2007 to today, we have had these murders perpetrated by trans people:

1) Kayleigh Louise Woods, tortured and killed her flatmate, Bethany Hill, with Bethany's ex boyfriend, Jack Williams, who she was now dating. Woods later had to be moved from a women's prison after having sex with other inmates. 2016
2) Craig Hudson/ Kimberly Green. Murdered wife along with other members of his family. She had been forced to write letters to reassure her parents she was ok. She was in her second pregnancy when the targeting began and after having the baby she was never seen again. She was found dead in a carpet, weighing 6 stone and with her ear split in two, her lip detached from her face, broken bones and cigarette burns.
3) Gerald Matovu, killed a man after repeatedly meeting gay men on tinder, drugging and robbing them.  He met Eric Michaels on Grindr in 2018, and gave him a lethal dose of GHB, leaving him dead, only to be found later by his children. Matovu and his boyfriend, an accomplice, were later caught on CCTV using the victim's credit cards. He is now transitioning in prison.
4) Gavin / Joyce Boyd, who murdered a 20 yr old girl who was his friend. 2008. He also has convictions for breaking into a woman's home and raping her.
5) Jenny Swift murdered her friend, Eric Flanagan, a father of two, in 2016. The attack was said to be 'totally unprovoked' and precipitated by a heavy drink and drug session of Swift's. One medic described it as 'the worst stabbing I have seen in my entire career in the ambulance service'.
6) Claire Darbyshire was found guilty of murdering her father. She was recently on a documentary with Ross Kemp on Belmarsh and a lot of people praised her as the murder was apparently a mercy killing, although carers disagreed with her, as did the court. She had been imprisoned before after breaking into her friend and bosses home and ejaculating and defecating all over her underwear. 2015
7) Melissa Young murdered elderly neighbour by repeatedly stabbing him after he was 'ungrateful' over Xmas present. Young had previously assaulted him. 2013
8) Paris Green, along with two men brought another back to their house for a drinking session. They robbed, beat him up then tortured him. Green sexually assaulted him with a rolling pin. Then they killed him. 2013
9) A trans man - Hannah/ Adam Bonser, murdered a 13 yr old girl 2012, stabbing the unknown child to death.
10) Nina Kinagassingham, threw friend in front of a tube train in 2010
11) William / Jilly Jaggs, 23. Stabbed Lucy Braham, 25, to death at her family home. Jaggs forced his way into the house and ferociously attacked her, cutting off her clothes with scissors. She had 66 stab injuries and Jaggs continued to mutilate her body after she died. 2007
12) Christopher Hunnisett. Hunnisett, 28, had begun a relationship with his victim Peter Bick after meeting through an online dating site. He had searched for Mr Bick after compiling a “hit list” of 900 supposed child sex offenders made up from gossip by fellow prisoners. The court was told that “not a shred of evidence” existed to show Mr Bick was a paedophile. Mr Bick had been bludgeoned and strangled with a shoelace.
Just four months before the murder of Mr Bick, Hunnisett had been acquitted at a retrial of drowning and dismembering 81-year-old Rev Ronald Glazebrook in 2001, for which he had served 8 years. Mr Glazebrook's head and limbs were found in a sports bag in Hastings, East Sussex, his dumped torso in Eastbourne. Hunnisett had accused Glazebrook of attempting a sexual assault.
After 2015 Hunnisett began to identify as a woman. He appeared at the high court (where he had pursued - unsuccessfully - a claim against the prison service for keeping him on segregation) he told the court 'I have cut off my testicles and sliced the shaft of my penis in half', complaining that the prison had 'a lack of respect' by recording this as self harm and not using female pronouns. 
13) Paul 'Keira' Fitzgerald originally imprisoned for the brutal assault and rape of a woman walking her dog, Fitzgerald decided to kill while in a sex offender's prison. He made plans to kill several, and first targeted Richard Huckle, 'Britains worst paedophile'. He enjoyed the rape, torture and murder of Huckle so much he was caught in the act, unable to continue onto any further victims

Non transsexual, but under trans umbrella:

14) Roderick Deakin-White, a transvestite who murdered his partner after she complained about his presenting as female. 2019
15) Graham Cleary-Senior, a transvestite. After what was apparently an 18 year marriage of continual domestic violence, he murdered his wife by stabbing in 2015
16) Philip Tarver, 47, stabbed his 86 year old mother in the heart, decapitated her, placing her head in a box in the freezer, and cut off her wedding ring finger and boiled it in a kettle. He then tried to blame his elderly father.  Tarver had lived in the family home for most of his life, and was open with his parents about his transvestism. On the morning of the murder he had come downstairs in a see-through negligee, before attacking his mother and then setting on his father when he tried to help her. Mrs Tarver had been severely disabled for nearly 30 years after a stroke. 2019.
17) Paul Hayhurst, a transvestite leading a double life, murdered his partner 2010 with a stab to the heart. After waiting about half an hour, Hayhurst staged a panicked call to emergency services, having placed the knife in his dying partner's hand.
18) Colin Coats, a transvestite, tortured Lynda Spence over 2 weeks having kidnapped her and tied her to a lounger, fully reclined, where she was left to urinate, defecate and forced to lie in it for the duration. He and another man paid regular visits to torture her by burning with an iron, cutting off her finger and thumbs to threaten someone else and breaking her legs with golf clubs, before murdering her. Lynda's body has never been found. 2013
19) Rowan Thompson, strangled his mother then stabbed her 118 times. Died before standing trial. 2019

Since 2007, seven trans people have been murdered, one by another trans person. In that same time, 19 trans people have been convicted of murder.

Attempted murder by a trans person
Lauren Jeska, went to the office of UK athletics and repeatedly stabbed him when he had asked for evidence of hormone levels (she was a pro fell runner, completing alongside women) 2016
Helen Doe, axed brother in the head while he slept. After the ambulance arrived, Doe said that he had intended to kill him. 2015
Joanne Latham tried to murder fellow patient in hospital. 2011. Latham also has two previous convictions for attempted murder. 
Alan / Sarah Baker, tried to murder fellow prisoner while serving a life sentence for kidnap and torture. 
Liam Suleiman / Lucy Edwards, tried to kill member of staff at Ashworth hospital 2018.

And again, if, after all this, we factor in how many were killed by partners during domestic violence (like many, many women), how many were killed during robberies, hit and runs or other non-transphobia-motivated crimes I think the 'killed for being trans' would cease flying, drop tothe ground and crawl away.
It is breathtakingly deceitful and manipulative to be constantly pushing this line. Why does anyone want trans people to believe this?

TRANS PEOPLE ARE AT HUGE RISK OF SUICIDE


Sadly, this is true. But it's more complex than suggesting it has a singular factor, and we desperately need to look at those factors around causation as well as be very, very cautious about how we discuss suicide, because suicide is a contagious tragedy, and it's time for editors, journalists, charities and activists to take note.

Janice Turner tackles the intense hyperbole of activists like Helen Belcher and Paris Lees and makes some important points here, in Suicides should never be a political weapon.




The Movement Advancement Project, a 'think tank speeding up equality for LGBT people' did an in-depth report on this. The report, in collaboration with Johnson Family Foundation, American Foundation for  Suicide Prevention, National Coalition for LGBT Health, GLAAD, The TREVOR Project and many more, said;
'Research has shown a link between repeated, sensationalized media coverage of suicide, and a subsequent increase in suicide deaths—a phenomenon known as suicide contagion
Contagion risk tends to occur when there is a high volume and prominence of media stories about a suicide death.... and when 
persons who have died by suicide are depicted in ways that encourage identification by vulnerable individuals.'



(For more information, read Recommendations for Reporting on Suicide,http://reportingonsuicide.org

Mermaids;'JK Rowling's comments have caused self harm and suicide attempts'  

Jeanette Jennings; 'I'd rather have a live daughter than a dead son'   
 NPR; 'LGBTQ Youth Mental Health Survey: 40% Have Considered Suicide in Past Year
LGBTQ Nation: 'Study finds Epidemic of Suicide Among Trans youth'
Pink News: 'One Third of Trans Youth Attempted Suicide in Past Year'

Transit: DO NOT DELAY. You have a moral responsibility as a parent to ensure the safety and happiness of your child as they grow up. If you allow them to go through their genitical puberty, you could very well end up with a dead child. Transgender people under the age of 25 are 5x more likely to commit suicide than their non-transgender peers, according to official statistics. This is directly related to trauma brought about by their puberty (if they went through their self-mutilating genetical puberty), and abuse that they might receive because of that, especially if they start *not passing as their desired gender* as a result.'

From the Samaritans:
'Avoid dramatic headlines and strong terms such as ‘suicide epidemic’. Oversimplification of the causes or perceived  ‘triggers’ for a suicide can be misleading. Suggestion that a single circumstance or incident, such as bullying, job loss, relationship breakdown or a bereavement, was the cause increases the risk of contagion. 
Vulnerable people experiencing similar issues are more likely to over-identify with the deceased when a single reason is given.
Avoid making unsubstantiated links' 

Susie Green, (CEO of Mermaids and well known public activist) 
'Tell that to the 4 families who donated funeral collections to Mermaids last year, after their children took their own lives. Each and every life lost because of prejudice and bigotry. Honestly, you need to fuck off. You know nothing'
Samaritans;'Steer clear of presenting suicidal behaviour as an understandable response to a crisis or adversity. This can... normalise suicide as an appropriate response to distress.
When media suggest that suicide 
is a natural response to such external factors... they may be more likely to think of suicide as a solution."
Interesting, then, that ITV's Butterfly, a drama heavily influenced by Susie Green of Mermaids tale of realisation her son was in fact a girl, also used the suicide narrative frequently (and erroneously implied the previous year four of their clients had committed suicide.) 
An investigation by associate professor Michael Biggs, in response to the Mermaids - informed ITV drama 'Butterfly' was carried out in 2018. He contacted GIDS, the gender identity development service at the Tavistock, a service for young people and children with gender dysphoria said 'suicide is extremely rare, with one case in the service in the last decade, of a young person who was inpatient at a psychiatric ward with severe psychiatric difficulties .'

Mr Biggs made a freedom of information request on the subject and ultimately found that over the course of 10 years there had been four suicides and four attempted suicides. Tragic, indicative of profound indivual suffering, but not quite as Susie Green wants us to believe. And then we need to ask why. Why does a mother who knows the shock, struggle, pain of a child coming out, not knowing what to do, want other parents to believe they will potentially cause their child to take their own life is they aren't affirmed?

*Please see https://gendercriticalwoman.wordpress.com/2019/09/12/suicide-in-the-trans-community/ for her excellent coverage which I've badly skimmed over here, along with Fair Play for Women, txtslady and

So, why, for the love of God, Dog and my gendered soul, are organisations supposedly here to protect and advocate for gender dysphoric youth behaving like this? Why are we supposed to be supporting a narrative that trans people are always trans, even when other issues like sexual abuse, psychiatric issues, social contagion via social media (ROGD), that they are murdered and despised by feminists and frequently driven to suicide? 

Mermaids on suicide prevention day, 2019;"Studies show that, just by using a transgender person’s correct name and pronouns, their anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts reduce to almost the same as their cisgender counterparts.
"We know that by failing to support trans children and young people, we are losing them to suicide."

Susie Green, The Daily Mail; “The blockers offer the only chance for them to stop the terrible trauma their children have started to go through as they begin to develop into a sex they feel is absolutely alien to them.”
“The self-harm and suicide rate among transgender teens is extremely high so offering blockers saves lives. It’s quite simple.”
Green reels off shocking figures from a 2014 study by the mental health charity Pace which surveyed 2,000 young people with gender issues: 48% attempt suicide, 58% self-harm. “It’s really common.” She pauses. “You can see why we’re worried.”

The study Susie is citing here was actually an online, anonymous questionaire. A non-probability sampling method that was targeted via online LGBTQ organisations, so already this is steered directly at youth who are reading LGBTQ media. I wonder how, knowing suicide and self harm are so frequently presented as a way those who REALLY are trans will behave, what that affect has young people. 


2,078 people completed the survey, of whom 120 were trans, and just 27 were under 26. So, out of a study that actually comprised 26 people, on an anonymous questionaire targeted at those already accessing trans groups and pages, THIRTEEN claimed to have attempted suicide in the past. 
The manipulative and underhand tactics among this movement, this relentless and unbounded grab to play victim, rescuer, persecutor, that batters those who dissent as bile-fuelled bigots while directly flouting guidelines on how to discuss the most sensitive issues responsibly, are staggering.
Threatening or insinuating there will be devastating consequences by way of victimising oneself is common, from toddlers who hold their breath to the crap parental guilt trip of 'that made me feel so sad',  emotional blackmail right the way to extreme domestic violence. To force someone into the role of persecutor by way of harming oneself, 'look what you made me do'. It's something adolescents do as they find their boundaries and scope of control. It's a very difficult attitude to deal with, when we love that person, and if they're our child and we are aware of the pressure to affirm. The most powerful threat is not to us, but to those we love most.

PUBERTY BLOCKERS, AFFIRMATION AND TRANSITION ARE THE ONLY WAY TO COUNTER THIS EPIDEMIC


Except, no. Left to their own devices, with support, the vast majority of children will desist by mid puberty. Stories where children are removed from those who mindlessly affirm, from their computers and smartphones, and then come to the realisation they are simply lesbian or gay are very common. The anecdotal reports of children going from extreme bullying for being gay, seen as weird and gender non-conforming, to coming out as trans and being celebrated by their peers are very common. Adolescence can be absolutely horrendous - racked with insecurity and fear; self conscious, searching for identity and community; feeling powerless and insignificant while simultaneously conspicuous. To then believe you've found the answer, a source of your pain, that is widely recognised as both vulnerable and brave (there's a definite romance to this) that has a strong prominence, that forces the adults to sit up and be very fucking careful with their words - that can bring all non-parental authority figures to the table to admonish your parents - this is a new drug. It feels far more threatening to the status quo than punk, and you are given a pedestal of moral superiority. Real power. I can see how completely intoxicating that is for many young people in pain.
but modern trans activism doesnt want you to think about this. These kids are expressing only their true, authentic selves. And they may commit suicide if they're hindered in their quest to fulfill it. 

This mean puberty blockers are the answer? 

Here's what I found with a quick search online;

'You will not get puberty blockers before your puberty damages you if using NHS. The only way to guarantee it is to self-medicate.'


This site then directs to GenderGP, an online practice which was founded by Helen Webberly, who was struck off and fined for illegally prescribing hormone blockers and cross sex hormones to children as young as 12. She then moved the business outside of the UK to circumvent the law in the UK     

https://transit.org.uk/children.html
'You can request blockers or full HRT, even at age 12. They have prescribed full HRT to children in the past! Go to the GenderGP clinic. You do not have to go to them physically, you can do everything over the internet, and they are licensed doctors. If you want *prescribed* HRT (or just blockers, if that’s what you want, but they also will prescribe full HRT if you want it), then this is your best bet. The NHS, by comparison, will make you wait, and by that time you’re screwed because you have breasts. Or a beard. Or a deep voice. Or periods. Don’t delay! These people are here to help you.'
'PARENTS: this is IMPORTANT!'

"You need to make sure that your child DOES NOT go through their genetical puberty, the one that their body is programmed to go through. It makes most trans people depressed, or worse, suicidal, especially as they get older. If you love your child, you will let them take hormones, including hormone blockers, as early as physically possible."


Well, the question now is; does transition help?

From Gender HQ -  'The Swedish National Board found that people with gender dysphoria who commit suicide have a very high rate of co-occurring serious psychiatric diagnoses, which in themselves sharply increase risks of suicide. Further, they found that the general population with no gender dysphoria diagnosis but with other psychiatric diagnoses, had even higher suicide rates than the gender-dysphoric population. Another study (Wiepjes 2020) states that suicides happen at all stages of transition, including post medical transition.

Unfortunately, no studies to date have shown that affirmation of children or adolescents reduces suicide, prevents suicidal ideation, or improves long-term outcomes, as compared to either “watchful waiting” or psychotherapy (Biggs 2020). High post-transition suicide rates found in the adult populations further complicates the “transition or suicide” narrative. It is vital that debate regarding the treatments and outcomes in the area of transgender health is conducted in a fair, responsible, and intellectually rigorous way, to improve the quality of the available evidence and to provide gender-dysphoric individuals, their families, and their clinicians with accurate information on which they can base their decisions.'

https://www.genderhq.org/trans-youth-suicide-statistics-kill-themselves-manipulate-parents

Gender dysphoria is a psychological condition. Where more traditional patriarchal society has demanded we change our behaviour to fit our bodies and the roles that we are assigned, this new order claims it is our bodies and gender roles we should change. That's how we can be our true selves, as if we all have an immutable, constant self. However many times you might ask for an explanation of what this true self that's liberated and expressed by transition is, I've never seen it be articulated without implied reference to an eternal, authentic self which is to be pursued, unearthed and polished. Even tiny children, toddlers, have this burning truth they must express. It lies there, restless and tormenting, like a little stone in your shoe. It has to be identified to stop the suffering. It must be honoured, for it is immutable and innate. Read some parent's stories of how they were forced to recognise this - look for descriptions over stereotypes and emotions like despair and rage. What is it they are trying to describe? Is it a soul?

A cohort study in Sweden from 1973-2003 studied 'Persons with transsexualism, after sex reassignment, have considerably higher risks for mortality, suicidal behaviour, and psychiatric morbidity than the general population. Our findings suggest that sex reassignment, although alleviating gender dysphoria, may not suffice as treatment for transsexualism' https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0016885
I at this stage began to collect data on puberty blockers, but the amount of deeply concerning material is massive and distressing, so it'll have to fit in another blog (A long list of links on puberty blockers, childhood transition, detransition etc is here). Overall tho, it seems apparent that children and their parents have not been given full disclosure on the risks, known and unknown. There are significant issues with suicidal ideation actually increasing, while the behaviour appears to turn from internalized to external. For natal boys there are significant problems later on if they choose to go for sex reassignment surgery later on as blocking puberty leaves them with children's pre-pubescent genitals. This means there is insufficient tissue to invert and form a neovagina. In addition to that while puberty blockers are sold to us as a magical pause button, the evidence shows they begin a cascade of intervention and map the way ahead to transition. Very few children (1% at the Tavistock) will take puberty blockers and then desist, as most would without them. Pubery will more often than not resolve the problems, and this obviously will be hard, these children need a lot of love and support, and anecdotally physical activities that can help them to bond with their bodies and feel some pride in their material self. To get outside, away from the bright lights, mirrors, pressure and introspection of modern life where we are sedentary, online, inside. Sadly I envisage a looming torrent of court cases with young people forever harmed by a medical profession that is sworn to help them. I really wouldn't be the parent of a trans child for tea in China and I can only imagine how they and their children are feeling. It is a medical scandal

I wait with baited breath to discover what the real objective is here. It can't be these children, and neither is it the anxious, insular, easily frightened trans people I know who are gleefully informed by self righteous liars they are intensely hated by feminists and will forever walk a tightrope, teetering between suicide and murder, while forever vigilant, straining to make out the dogwhistles from the applause.
This is about something other than the welfare of trans people and the tactics are propaganda campaigns which enable violent men to do what they want.
Challenge this. Remember what the women before us fought for, and don't give it away for momentary fluffy feels. 



Friday, 23 October 2020

the emperor's new woke bloke cloak of misogyny

Feminism, huh? We all know what feminism is, don't we? Feminism is about equality for all. We know this...

Feminism is not one singular practice. It has evolved and diverged as an organic practice would.
Its definition has changed, sometimes fundamentally, from a philosophy that holds material analysis at its core; that seeks to abolish patriarchal control, viewing gendered stereotypes as prisons; That oppression of women is the fundamental oppression which carries its influence through every other social strata where power resides, with an imperative on revolutionary change; It may view female oppression as a function of capitalism, and see liberation via the overthrow of capitalism. In recent times intersectionality has featured strongly in theory, often in ways that do not necessarily reflect the views set out by Kimberlè Crenshaw when she first proposed it. Most recently we have been bestowed with a popularised liberal feminism, which seeks change through the systems already in place. It cries for equality in a structure already built, arguing for an equal status in it.

This is a fundamental and profound difference: do we change society by dismantling and restructuring our lives, relationships, our values, with the changing of a predatory and insidious economic system; or do we fight for an equal footing inside of it, seeking compromise and gradual reform?

When women and girls are not central to feminism, something profound has occurred. When we talk of not the sexes but genders, and seek to represent everybody based on a scale of vulnerability, when those normally held as the most privileged  - straight, white, western males, become the star of the show by making a claim to be women, there is a problem. This is not feminism.

It’s not possible, surely, that under the guise of a ‘feminism' touted as righteous by every left-leaning, pop culture media and corporate PR, that’s influenced so many facets of our society, misogyny has been revitalised? 
The ancient woman-hatred that dismissed some of us as old, stupid, frigid, spiteful, sexually repressed and intrusively fascinated in the sex lives of others; as judgemental, ugly, hysterical bitch or witch, that hasn’t made a reappearance?

Feminism has a long history of women fighting for equality and liberation, because our biological status as women means we are physically smaller and weaker than men, less threatening than men, and perceived as objects to be fucked, claimed, restricted and oppressed. All our emotional mess with our bloody wombs and procreative potential. 

Everywhere and always, we are tied to the domestic sphere, where we cook, clean, care and comply. All over the world and in every stage of civilisation, you will see the same dynamic. Feminism is a movement which changed the law: the vote; abortion; rape in marriage became a crime; the equal pay act; maternity cover; divorce rights; changes to how domestic violence is treated by police. They formed shelters for women and their children fleeing male violence, rape crisis centres. They built a framework which examined patriarchal society, fought for and protected women.

The exclusion of males was not out of hatred. Women raise sons too; they have fathers, brothers, male friends and lovers who they respect and love. But this is about feminism, and feminism is about WOMEN.

Compare and contrast with modern day feminism.

An inclusive, permissive and slogan-led lifestyle. Where movie producers are rapist scum for bribing actresses on the casting couch, but other women are empowered by submitting to the sexual urges of men for economic relief. 
Where paying a twentysomething to bear pregnancy, then swiftly removing the baby can be a legitimate service in the economy.

Where the contradictions are studiously ignored and critics are demonised, mocked, wildly misrepresented. A sort of Spice Girl philosophy in a world of perfect smiles and bodies, cheeky dance moves, arse-pinching, and flirting with the old guys while occasionally shouting 'girl power!' in contrived demonstrations of rebellion.

In this supposedly brave new world, images of bondage-strapped women being humiliated, porn titles telling us she was 'destroyed', is 'barely legal' is just commerce. Adult men dressing as babies, masturbating while their nappies are changed, they must not be kink shamed.

Pornography is valid, it's self empowerment, it might stop rape too - like prostitution, we know the sexual needs of men are non negotiable, they are primal, irrepressible. So, accept that and leave safer routes for fulfilment. Sex workers would be ok if it wasn't for stigma. 
We won't look at the foundations of those who climb into the back of a motor for a quick blow job.
Their drug problems, disenfranchised lives and histories of abuse are a separate issue. 

In online prostitute review sites, punters ridicule, demean, gleefully recount the times they got away with a breach of consent (rape) by removing the condom on a woman too inebriated to notice. They share tips, explaining the desperate women stood out in the rain with all the pressures of an addiction can easily be coerced into half price sex acts. Anything to escape the cold or withdrawal. 
These are not really relevant, 'sex work is work'. No accusations of slut shaming occur here when the punters call women every degrading term under the sun. The reality of these broken women's lives is too removed from the woke feminist. 

They picture the well heeled, assertive, atypical prostitute, or the hard working undergrad who could never make this kind of money waiting tables, who makes it through this patch of prostitution, out into the professional world, remarkably unscathed. They hold those images in their head and avert their gaze, staring straight ahead like the dog walker who won't acknowledge the shit their pet has just laid in the park.

You do not get to have an opinion in the sex lives of adults, no matter how abusive, paedophilic or disturbing. 

Adults are by virtue of their adulthood autonomous. They can say no, they can call the police. Any closer examination of power structures, the consequences of a patriarchy which has enforced norms and standards - a hierarchy of not just power but value of individuals, the true, life-destroying shaming of those cast as sluts - there’s rarely the time.

The cheering championing of sex work is not interested in the socio-economic and psychological etymology of those who enter into it. These will, undoubtedly, be dealt with as entirely unrelated to prostitution.                                                                                                         
*'sex work's not for me, but I support those who do choose it!'*vacuous chants to fade...

So, let’s keep going with this new incarnation of feminism, which advocates for all genders!

Males can be women. Males can experience misogyny. A story of intense oppression and abuse of trans people is spun, because advocacy has morphed from genuine concern and advancement into an ego-wank which accrues status. 
It posits the champion of the oppressed as the cause célèb. 
This, dear reader, is often not really about trans people. This is a psychological game of victim, rescuer, persecutor. Thus a persecutor must be found, and they should be as visible as possible. And besides, a mob isn’t always bad. Sometimes it's justice, and it’s fun when you feel part of something. 

‘TERF’ began life as a simple acronym; trans exclusionary radical feminist. The trouble is, it’s been used so much, often with so much vitriolic abuse, so many rape and death threats, and for so many disparate thought crimes, it is both a slur and meaningless. 

Is TERF reserved for radical feminists? Do these people even know what a rad fem is? No. 
What exactly is a TERF? A transphobe? If so, why don’t you shout 'transphobe' at us, brave young lib fems and assorted woke blokes? What threat do radical feminists, those who angrily countered gender stereotypes, who built places of refuges, who fought for gay rights, pose? 
What is it they do that requires a special name? Who do they beat up, kill?

Declaring ‘TERF!’ is an easy way to assert yourself online, or in public (if you’re in a group). It instantly marks that woman as a bile-fuelled propagandist; hysterical, lying, ridiculous and beyond credibility. This TERF is bigoted, past it, ugly, stupid. She can be dismissed, every comment deluged in laughing emojis. She’s not worth engaging with – in fact you must not, she is toxic, and her ideas are contagious as well as having the ability to kill, even when uttered in secret.

But let’s tell the story, of the greatest oppression, the most vulnerable people in our society...

This, this, will justify any harsh slap downs of women who raise what could be reasonable points (dog whistles. they're dog whistles! It’s not as innocent a remark as you might think – this is a TERF).

So, it goes that trans people are extremely vulnerable, suffering a drastic rise in hate crime. They are driven to commit suicide, and attempt it at a terrifying rate. Because of the endless misery of their lives.  And TERFs.

Most seriously, there is an epidemic of murder against trans people (*will tackle these points in a subsequent blog.) Because of this, and the constant harassment, abuse and the fear this causes, trans people need special attention, care and allyship. Benign tolerance is not enough, celebration and validation is essential. Trans people, trans women and trans women of colour especially, need representation and solidarity. Consequently, any sniff of non compliance, of questioning or exclusion from womanhood is to be called out.

I have a word of warning regarding the victim / rescuer / persecutor dynamic. It is never a stable or altruistic relationship. It hinges on the continued infantilising of the victim, who must be always needy and grateful lest the roles change. If you wanted to empower yourself then, think on.

These claims, the purported facts and statistics are so jam-packed with lies, misinterpretation, and based on such tiny study numbers, it becomes an overwhelming tangle of nonsense so powerful it can submerge civilisations. 

It is so out of focus, skewed and manipulated you need a strong gut, thick skin and iron-clad resolve to challenge it. Suffice to say, there are many groups in much more vulnerable situations, with far less representation and commercial backing.

Women have just begun to access the offices of power, to shake free from ancient shackles and the societal pressure to not 'cause a scene'. 
This remarkable change that now hails misogynistic abuse as an act of progressive advocacy; that refuses to condemn the harassment, vexatious legal action, vandalism and harassment of rape crisis centres; which looks the other way when ancient woman-hate is directed at feminists who don't comply; who demands women accept cocks in their prisons, shelters and orifices - this needs one hell if a sub-structure to counterbalance the overreach. The foundations of which lie in the constant reiteration of vulnerability.

Because that, somehow, justifies it all.

Paris Lees writes in The Independent that a request from a journalist to take part in a feature about “the row” between those Paris calls 'TERFs' and trans people, there was just no way. 
Why? Because:

"She told me it would be a “balanced” piece that listened to “all the sides of the debate”. I offered her a quote: 
“In Britain, 48 per cent of young trans people have attempted suicide. What drives them to feel so hopeless, desperate and alone? Could it be the widespread social exclusion, family rejection, workplace discrimination, media ridicule, poor healthcare and street violence trans people face? If you want to talk about trans issues, start here.”’

So I'm assuming that by ‘start here', Paris means this is the only way we can focus correctly. It's funny though, because, as a 'journalist' it's entirely up to Paris to pursue this angle (*again, these statistics are untrue  please see Transgender Trend, The Suicide Myth

Paris is free to follow this 'lead', although it's a bit of a tired one. Why Paris has a wish to publicise such defensive, dismissive tone towards a journalist with a different process is strange. It's entirely unnecessary - unless, that is, I allow my cynicism enough oxygen to gasp the most heinous of taboos - a civil, fact based, open dialogue which seeks to find compromise: this is the last thing the gender ideologue wants.
Paris is not able, is dismissing it with exhausted, hackneyed tropes he must know are bullshit. 

The trans activists don't want liberation from a vulnerable status - they want supremacy. An entitlement forged in the fires of victim-hood. There's a reason no-platforming and refusal to appear alongside feminists prevails. Honesty is the worst policy.

Are we also to believe it is radical feminists, or women, who work in a basis of biological reality, are the cause of this suffering? Or is the 'fact' of this suffering simply a hall pass to access all areas of women's lives, protections and successes?

This is a self-righteous, defiant refusal to acknowledge the fact that there are clashes among trans rights and women’s rights. Trying to look dignified while avoiding difficult subjects which require conversation, mutual respect and facts. They look straight ahead. Do not talk to the TERFs. Don’t let them an inch. 

The overwhelming pressure on trans people is a powerful narrative. It commands attention and it makes any difference of opinion look crass, selfish, bigoted. So we end up in a scenario which is prime liberal feminist fodder – be nice, be kind, let the doors of toilets, prison, refuges fly open for these poor people. 

Be the decent, underdog-championing progressive and advocate your own humility and caring, sharing ideals. It creates a philosophy where liberal feminists who say they believe all women, who vociferously defend the right of anyone to withdraw consent at any stage of sex (quite rightly) tell lesbians that when they find their date has not a vulva but a hard penis, they made that bed, they better lie in it. 
Refusing a woman's cock is an egregious assault which is synonymous with white supremacy. Or something.

This is a world where ‘women rape too!’ Where experiencing normal fear of male bodies is an offence, and even hundreds of examples of men playing the trans card to absolve themselves of consequences when up on rape charges is entirely irrelevant. This should be dismissed with obscene personal messages, offemsive memes and those laughing emojis. 

This is an ecosystem of western angst, where FGM campaigners are vilified for using the word ‘female genital mutilation’ and drives against banishing menstruating girls and women to period huts can only be supported if they omit the words 'girl' and 'woman'.
That is, supposedly, essential to make sure trans men and non binaries, people existing almost entirely in the West, are reflected. 

It is here that racist comparisons of black women to men, or a deeply insulting version of events that holds 'indigenous' and 'non western' cultures as so innocent that they didn't know how babies were made until the white colonialists appeared, are justified. 

But it's alright, because they’re sure to have a BLM frame. Supporting Black lives Matter means this individual has checked their privilege, done all the historical and introspective work necessary to say this, to attach a new ideology and proclaim themselves as an advocate and ally who can't speak for all black people, of course. But they can give it a go...

Here, women who are not white are completely synonymous with males with penises. Exclusion is wrong, they say. Sex is a social construct just as race is. They're the same. The fact that there actually are profound biological differences between males and females, and no race commits sex crimes on a par to that of men, is not important. We are allowed not a scrap of discrimination. Trans women have a pedestal that eclipses and explains all sexually aggressive behaviour, only superseded when it becomes too obvious, and they become outliers. Remember Myra Hindley and Rose West? (The fact they acted with men is, again, irrelevant). 

It’s appropriate and laudable to paint women as mean, spiteful, privileged prudes with hysterical notions of rape and ideas above their station. Joining dog-piles which ridicule her, where her fears are laughed off as frigid histrionics is encouraged. TERF is a label that precedes misogyny and subsequently forgives it. For, don’cha know, there’s an epidemic of murder and hate crimes.

Misogyny is not a hate crime, but this lack of protection, equality or a control group is of course not relevant. The ferocity of police investigating an online misgendering, while a famous author is bombarded with thousands upon thousands of sexually aggressive, degrading and abusive misogynistic tweets with zero ‘non crime hate incident’ interrogations just shows the police are catching on.
Women’s prisons, where you really find the most vulnerable and disadvantaged, are not within the realm of the liberal feminist. Never have they had no control over who lives with them, been beyond the reach of their parents. If female prisoners are raped by a supposed trans woman with ‘her' cock, that’s nothing on what would happen to a trans woman in a man's prison. Some victims are more equal than others.

If women’s refuges, built by those troublesome feminists of the seventies, don’t accept all women then that’s a problem!

Undoubtedly they have a second hand story of the vulnerable woman and trans woman in crisis, who rebuilt each other with love and sisterhood. Are there concerns about intruders using a guise of a trans identity? If there are, they can be sifted out and refused. Somehow a risk assessment will identify any bad actors, and will continue to do so even when evidence says otherwise. 
If somehow a woman who’s whole life has been broken apart in a bid for freedom from an abuser has a gut reaction to a deep voice, an Adam's apple, that’s a problem she will have to learn to mitigate. The trans woman is central to feminism here, and don’t you forget that. Vulnerability is the essence of womanhood. Be vulnerable in the Brave New World.

Unlike Black Lives Matter, which is noble for centring black people, feminism cannot centre females. While racist analogies abound, BLM is a central part of the posturing among the liberals feminists. ‘All lives matter’ is an appalling slur, it misses the point, it’s appropriation. Simultaneously, feminism is for everyone.  And that's that.

I’m unsure when women achieved such incredible privilege they were sitting on excessive shares that need to be paid in reparation to biological males. It passed me by. 

There could, if material analysis, class analysis, any fuckin analysis were used, be a very good argument that western men and women who collect the slogans and experience such a deep security which enables this treacherous denial of biological reality and abdication of any solidarity with the truly vulnerable and oppressed, is a psycho-social phenomenon on a parallel with Just World Theory. That a warped, conspicuous and authoritarian campaign of self-aggrandising non-think has swept up a significant enough mass that critical thinking is unnecessary and unpalatable.

I hope, for the welfare of women and girls worldwide, I am wrong.

Trans People Have No Dispute With Feminists, They Either Support Transgender Rights Or They Do Not


Saturday, 17 October 2020

The 'your problem is with predatory men and NOT trans women!' and other mic-drops which leave us TERFs feeling silly


Somewhere, online, a conversation has begun over self id, gender neutral toilets or changing rooms or trans women in women's prisons and refuges. Have a look, you will find one happening now, which sounds almost exactly like this;

🙎‍♀️A woman, probably - 'I'm not against anyone living how they want to; I don't want to add to any oppression trans people face. I just don't think it's ok to open the doors to women's spaces, on the self identification of males. Because it is males who endanger us all'

🏳️‍🌈Gender ideologue - 'So, you think trans women deserve to be raped in men's toilets?'

🙎‍♀️Woman - 'No, no! I just value privacy and I...'

🏳️‍🌈Gen Id - 'Have a primary kid's understanding of biology*? Don't know that brain scans of trans and cis women's match*? Don't understand that gender isnt the sa...'

🙎‍♀️Woman, a little more tense - 'No, don't misrepresent me, please...'

🏳️‍🌈Gen Id - 'Misrepresent you! Trans women are women yet you obviously think they are men'

(Let's pause here, for a moment. Go have a look at some online interactions. Check the level of hostility. Look at who is strawmanning who.)

(*Their often vaunted brain scan and biology nonsense will have to wait for another day)

🙎‍♀️Woman - 'What I'm saying is, how do we know? How can I tell who is potentially a danger?'

🏳️‍🌈Gen Id - 'Do you think that signs on doors stop rapists? Maybe every door should say 'please don't rape', and no one would be - we'd live in a safe society!'

🙎‍♀️Woman - 'No, but there's reasons we have different toilets, and safety is one, isn't it?'

🏳️‍🌈Gen Id - 'Do you have a man's toilet and a woman's toilet at home, or is it used by everyone?'

🙎‍♀️Woman (increasingly irritated) - 'I know who is in my house, I control who comes in and just one person a time uses it. I feel like allowing anyone to walk in is dangerous, and these things have happened to people before..' 

🏳️‍🌈GI - 'No! They haven't! What HAS happened is trans women getting beaten up and raped in men's toilets. But thats ok with you?'

🙎‍♀️W - 'Of course it's not, I just feel like it makes women's spaces meaningless if anyone who feels like it can walk in, whichever sex. I feel like men will abuse it and ...'

🏳️‍🌈Gen Id - 'Your problem is with predatory men, NOT TRANS WOMEN!'

BOOM. At this stage you'll probably find a deluge of love and care reacts have landed on Gen Id's comment. A meme, maybe about TERFs, has appeared. Likely the conversation has stopped. That may be because progress looks unlikely, which is true.


And yet, Charlie, men have given up their whole lives to become priests, teachers, scout leaders, coaches, to access victims. And no, having an accounting / business / finance degree is no testament to good intention, but you definitely don't need to put in four years to self identify. Men lie about their identity to trick people ALL THE TIME. Ted Bundy used to have his arm in a sling and manipulate women with a story he was too incapacitated to load groceries into the back of his truck. 

Good god, listen to yourselves

It's genuinely difficult to stand up against this barrage of pre-scripted replies and a person who finds a way of glossing over or avoiding every point. Who has had ample experience of picking through your words to select anything that could be misconstrued, to derail you. 

This is a 'debate' that is dress rehearsed hundreds of times a day, and those who have seen a few might well feel uncomfortable in running the risk of being seen as unkind, being painted into a corner and ridiculed as hysterical. The onus is always on the woman to prove she is not acting out of hate. And she cannot win it; they will find a way to portray her as hateful. They will ridicule her, accuse her of using dog whistles, or they will reply with insults and an instant block.











It's a bizarrely powerful expectation that we, as women, are to be the kind ones, the ones who should be moved to compassion and sharing. To kiss every scraped knee. The tropes that run against 'bad' women are older than the hills.


Difficult women, who convey their abject misery by being mean, spiteful, frigid, uptight or by happily putting it about but not to all. The Witch, the Bitch and the Whore.

 

Worthless, old, cruel and always in the fucking way. Past it and obsessed with genitals, with other people's sex lives like a slut shaming voyeur.

'Sex positive feminism' - where, luckily, all the punters are accommodated.

This is especially potent if you have any leaning toward socialism or an eye on social justice. The idea that you, uppity bitch, are hoarding your privilege and denying dignity and safety to this tiny, vulnerable, victimised community is sometimes too much to bear.

'TERF' - that word which centres women as the prime aggressor and oppressor of trans people - it's often used as synonymous with white supremacy, isn't it? It's the vindictive white woman who falsely accuses black boys of rape, smiling as their nooses are hitched up the tree.


It's all of the stigmas above. It's colonialism, apparently, enforcing strict gender roles on innocent, peaceful native folk who had more understanding of the gendered soul. It's leaving Rosa Parks to bloody well stand up at the back of the bus and even driving a gay son to suicide.

In many ways, it's even worse; it's hatred of men.


Because, if we look beyond sound bites, it's a well worn and familiar characterisation, but it's not logical. 'TERFs' are often lesbians, including those who really go out of their way to hurt men - by refusing any penis, even it identifies otherwise.


The liberal feminism of corporate America is fun. It might be a pain in the arse sometimes, but it also takes it up the arse, which clearly makes all the difference.


The corporate feminism of 'sex work is real work', that keeps itself busy 'liberating' women and girls*. Women and girls who may be escorting a man to that business dinner and then up to his hotel room, or dancing in a g-string while they have drinks: but, there's probably another woman there who's on the board, which is feminism! 
The brave 'sex work is real work' right-on good persons, who don't personally want to do it, but 'won't judge those who do!' Who say 'you go girl!' and 'fuck SWERFs' with wide eyed excitement.
























(*Those girls, who are also often the poorest. Who normally first start while still in their teens, often become addicts and are extremely likely to have been abused in childhood and adulthood. Who is paying exorbitant fees to a business which is probably male run, or perhaps to a brothel owner who sells themselves as a progressive, keeping women safe. Often, it's a boyfriend. A boyfriend who couldn't possibly cope with all the inherent liberation of bending over and thinking of equality on instruction)

This capitalist repackaging that prides itself in equality by pasting BLM frames on profile pictures, rainbow flags and Pride events, but doesn't like to talk about period huts, child marriage or FGM. Which should, FYI, be just 'Genital Mutilation'. Because not every vulva belongs to a woman (see here for the abuse FGM survivors receive from trans activists) It also tends to incubate in the young as self-declared anti-fascism, as communism or (and sometimes also) anarchy. Cos that's a fairly easy state to achieve, while maintaining equality... And it looks so radical and edgy.



































I'm sure it stands up against some racism, the sexism of some adverts or excesses of particular movie producers. But would it be ok, good even, if the actresses were paid, not just bribed into putting out? Is there actually a difference? And its reach beyond capitalist systems? These, I would argue, are minimal. They take our words and spaces, they sell them back to us as better, more accessible and generic.


Building a hierarchy of individuals is fine if it's upside down. It's iconoclastic! Refreshing, huh?! 

The fact that trans people in the U.K. are more likely to be convicted of murder than be the victim of it; That the murder rate of trans people in America is, according to Wilfred Riley at Kentucky state university 'surprisingly low' - 1.48 out of a 100,000 - significantly lower than that of men, who are murdered 6.68 to every 100,00. And a fraction of black men, who are murdered at a rate of 18.8 (please see Sex, Lies and an Invidious Landscape for more on this).

When we know that most American trans people are white males and earn above $50,000 a year, that supposed vulnerability looks different. But hush. This could be seen as 'misleading'. 


How anarchic is it to have hate crime laws which stifle discussion? To scream down meetings of women who have concerns about newly written law? How anti-fascist, feminist or democratic is it to be excluding women who say factual, sometimes inconvenient, counter-narrative things, from political parties? Or screaming them down and using threats of sexual violence? Or portraying them as guilty when one non-binary male kills a trans woman? How socialist is the surgical and pharmaceutical industry? How on earth does post-modernist gender ideology, which posits (unobservable, self described) gender is the only metric worth considering, certainly more than natal sex, sit alongside a Marxist philosophy that holds material analysis as central? How does the anti-establishment cloak of gender activism manage to hide all of the gaudy sponsor stickers from Coca-Cola, Disney, Exxon Mobil, Google, Amazon and 89% of the Fortune 500?









In Marxism, the material is key (Queering marxism - the wokest pantomime). The systems, ideas, the rules and laws are based entirely on the material; the observable. If they contradict the material facts it is untenable, it fractures, crumbles and breaks. These absolutist, unwavering and unwittingly ideological fools who reel off their ego-grooming politics with acronyms, catchphrases, esoteric-sounding terms do not have a fucking clue.

How does gender ideology fight against racism while consistently using racist, masculine stereotypes against black women? When it places trans and black women together, constantly, in a 'same difference' narrative? When refugees who have suffered and campaign against FGM are consistently berated for using the word female? 



Mainly, to return to the point - How do we tell who is a predatory man and who is a trans woman? At what stage do I get to call out the person following too close behind me? Who touches me, maybe accidentally? Who pushes the toilet or changing room door open on me? If you're in that bar, when I shout and object, will you wait to hear what's happened before jumping to proud, ideological conclusions?

Of the hundreds, probably thousands, of sex offenders who have used a trans identity, how many have made their trans identity revoked? Karen White still gets female pronouns. So does Katie Dolotowski. So does Jessica Yaniv. It's funny how it slides from the predator vs trans narrative to 'Karen White is just a bad person, a danger with or without a penis'? isn't it odd how that slippery slope from disbelief, denial to defence always happens?

Trying to educate this lovely guy on that being exactly what proper single sex spaces are for was a lost cause.


Morgane Oger gleefully forced the end of funding for the only single sex rape support in Canada 

How do we tell? Or are we just human shields and collateral damage? How many women and children can be raped in this brave new world before we give this some thought?

Contrary to what are normally core tenets of social justice, this comes from a staggering lack of compassion, and breathtakingly privileged talking down. I've yet to speak to one gender ideologue who has been in prison or in a refuge; who has been left to sleep on the streets, with no parents ready to helicopter in. 




Women are not ok, we are raped and murdered by men. We are primed to be 'kind', acquiescent, to conform and not make a scene. I have been raped, beaten, homeless, and I have been afraid for much of my life. 


My only respite has been age, which is now used against me, to shame, discount and dismiss me as past it, of not understanding. After decades, since I was a small girl, of weird, creeping men, of men who think I owe them because of a drink or a lift, or sexual assault in crowded gigs, or being raped, or being followed and groped. Unable to walk home at night. Scared of walking up the road because of the shouts the builders make every day, and walking round the long way. Or walking with my keys poking through the fingers of my clenched fists. Of watching what i wear, of crossing the road when a man walks behind me. Of talking loudly about my boyfriend who's coming to meet me now. Or locking the windows on a hot night. Of never camping out alone. Of self defence classes and learning to take down my ponytail or make a man look at me as I try to talk and humanise myself. To let him know I've seen his face. To know when to leave a house or a party.


My spaces are not your refuges to usher in the miscellaneous vulnerable, so you can feel benevolent and righteous. Your quick, jingoistic phrases shows your closed mind. Your instant self-satisfaction with your role in this is a terrible tell. We all know it. You don't have a clue.